Rough draft #3

This reminded me of a boomerang. All the times I've tried to throw it out of my head, it keeps on coming back to me. It won't stop. It can't stop. But somehow I found it comforting knowing that it was apart of her.

It was the day of my grandma's funeral. So many things had been running through my mind. I kept on flashing back to the day that she passed away. I clearly rememberd that day. Until it started, and until it stopped.

My nails nearly half bitten off, knots in my stomach, and tears about to pour down the sides of my cheeks. All of these pains made it even harder to accept the fact that this was the last time that I would ever see her. This was the last time I could talk to her. And share my memories with her. Like bake cupcakes with her right after she picked me up from school, and right when they got out of the oven we would eat them til' our tummies hurt. Or the the times when we were little kids. She would take us on strolls down to the park or get something to eat. But most importantly I could never have that speacial bond with my grandma because she was gone. And was never coming back.

Beeeeeeep, was the sound that woken me from my thoughts. I tried to keep everything bottled up inside of me. But when I heard that sound, my tears just bursted out like sprinklers. I dashed my way to the room that she was in. I ran so fast that I nearly missed the room. Walking back, I took a step back to breathe and release all the stress. I swallowed a dry gulp that follwed down my throat, and sunk into my stomach. It was this feeling that I had never felt. For the first time I actually understood what pain felt like. Not kind of pain you feel when you fall and get a bruise or cut, but the type of pain that hurts inside of you. It felt like someone ripped out a piece of your heart and threw it away.It was all for nothing. But then I realized, that if this was the only way of keeping her alive, it would hurt her alot. She is in a better place now. She deserves the best because she has been through alot and needs to rest. And now I can't wait to go to sleep because she somtimes appears in my dreams to come tell me that she is still with all of us and everything is going to be alright.

Rough draft #2

"It's okay baby. Don't cry. I love you." My grandma had said wiping my salty wet tears from my red face. Those words had been the last that she said to me, and up until this day these words had been playing through my mind. Like a broken record that wouldn't stop.

I never really believed that as you get older, time flys right past you. But now as I get older many things begin to change. It was the day of my grandmas funereal. So many things had been running through my mind that day. So many memories that I had shared with her. In my mind I kept flashing back to the day that she passed away. Every single detail was clear to me. When it started, until it stopped.

I had heard a terrifying yelp that made me worry. I knew it happened, but I didn't want to believe it. I dashed so fast that I nearly missed the room that my grandma was in. As I was walking back I had heard that long beeeeeeeep. I had swallowed a dry lump in my throat, that followed through my chest and then sunk into my stomach. I had never felt anything like this before. So many things had been running through my mind right now that I had forgotten the most important thing. I had lost my hero. My friend. But most importantly my grandma.As I started to move my foot forward, instead I took one back and then took a second to breathe. Then I decided to take my step. My head drooped down as I walked into the room. As I looked up, I saw my relatives with sorrow faces and streaks of salty wet tears running down on the sound of their faces. Then I had looked straight. She had caught my eye. After all this time I had kept everything bottled up inside of myself, and once I let it out I felt relived. Each time a tear rolled down my cheek, it reminded me of a memory that I shared with her. Like every time she would pick me up after school, the minute we got home we would head straight to the cupboard and pull out cake mix. Then after they came fresh out of the oven, we would eat them til' our tummy's hurt. Or like the other time when my cousins and I were young she would take us on little strolls down to the bakery or a fast food place. Now I could never look back on those wonderful memories with the one person I shared them with. I couldn't believe it. She was gone. Forever and was never coming back.The night after the funeral, my mom's footsteps had woken me up. She was walking down the hallway to get a glass of milk. Right when she turned on the lights, a huge light came into my room and out of the window. I knew it was her to say that she was here to stay with us. And now I can't wait until I go to sleep because every now and then she appears in my dreams to come and tell me that everything is going to be alright.

Interior monologue

My hands covering my red face covered with salty wet tears rolling down each cheek. So many things had been running through my mind right now. Like my memories with her, how could this have happend, and please be a dream and awake me right this second. So many things had came at once that I had forgotten that I had lost a friend. A hero. But most importantly I lost my grandma.

Incorporating dialogue and adding "gesture"

"It's okay baby don't cry. Don't cry. I love you." My grandma said as she wipped the salty wet tears that rolled down each cheek.

Different Leads

1. How could have this happened? It all went by so fast. I remember when I was little we would go down for little strolls to the down to the doughnut shop strolls in the park, and now it came to this.

2. Many people say that time flys. I've never believed it until this very day.

4. "It's okay baby don't cry. Don't cry. I love you." These were the words that had been running through my mind the day of my grandma's funeral. Those were the last words she had said to me. It was like a broken recorded that was that kept playing the over and over again that wouldn't stop even when i tried my hardest. But I wanted it that way because it was the last memory that I had of her. It was like antidote that healed my pain.

Flash Back

I am going to use the flash back technique for my memoir. I'm going to start with the last event of my timeline and then I'm going to start from the beginning of my time line.

Rough Draft #1

There I was. Sitting on my grandpa's old black couch. And had so many crumbs between the cracks. And made it uncomfortable to sit on.Well the fact that I had 3 little cousins made it easier to be live. And also I couldn't sit anywhere else besides the floor because all of my relatives were in town for my cousins birthday. And to see my grandma take her last breath.

As I was flipping the channels with the remote, I had heard a loud scream that grabbed my attention. I knew it happened. I ran so fast that I nearly missed the room that my grandma was in. As I was walking back I had heard that long beeeeeeeep. I had swallowed a dry lump in my throat, that followed through my chest and then sunk into my stomach. I had never felt anything like this before. So many things had been running through my mind right now that I had forgotten the most important thing. I had lost my hero. My friend. But most importantly my grandma.


As I started to move my foot forward, instead I took one back and then took a second to breathe. Then I decided to take my step. My head drooped down as I walked into the room. As I looked up, I saw my relatives with sorrow faces and streaks of salty wet tears running down on the soud of their faces. Then I had looked straight. She had caught my eye. After all this time I had kept everything bottled up inside of myself, I decided since everyone is letting it out, then why not me?

Each time a tear rolled down my cheek, it reminded me of a memory that I shared with her. Like everytime she would pick me up after school, the minute we got home we would head straight to the cupboard and pull out cake mix. Then after they came fresh out of the oven, we would eat them til' our tummy's hurt. Or like the other time when my cousins and I were young she would take us on little strolls down to the bakery or a fast food place. Now I could never look back on those wonderful memmories with the one person I shared them with. I couldn't belive it. She was gone. Forever and was never coming back.

The night after the funeral, my mom's footsteps had woken me up. She was walking down the hallway to get a glass of milk. Right when she turned on the lights, a huge light came into my room and out of the window. I knew it was her to say that everything was going to be alright and that she was here to stay with us. And now everyday I can't wait until I go to sleep because every now and then she pops up in my dreams.